The Five Stages of Grief: Discovering You Are On Fire

by Jon Tewksbury

Denial
It’s just a little toasty in here. I’m fine.

Anger
Oh God! I just bought this fucking shirt!

Bargaining
Okay, if I dump this cup of oil on my head then the fire might….. oh.

Depression
No one’s going to want to date me covered in flames.

Acceptance
If I run around flailing my arms it might look kinda funny.